will spend eternity knowing my children as adults. But tonight, right
here, right now, and for the next precious years, I have the rare
privilege of knowing them as a child. What a gift to experience the
children in our lives as children! For a brief moment during the journey
of mortality, we get to watch them laugh, learn, experience, grow."
You may or may not have noticed I'm barely on my FB page anymore. You don't see a whole lot of sessions being previewed & I'm not posting ploys to get you to book with me, such as contests or discounts. I'm not blowing up your news feed to try and stay fresh in your mind. I have struggled with this blog post for over a month to try and explain 'where' I am. Then I found the above quote. That says exactly what I didn't know how to put into words.
I'm slow this summer with my photography business because I have made the conscious decision to be so. There are many factors that have gone into me deciding to back off a little, but the main reason is my family. For 2 consecutive summers I was booked, nearly every weekend and I missed out on playing with my kids a lot because with photo sessions come a lot of editing. I do not like to edit when my kids are home because if I'm staring at the computer, who is paying them attention or keeping them from playing in the street?! They spent a lot of time at daycare and I did not have children so that someone else could raise them. My husband and I agreed when I was pregnant with our son, that I would be a stay-home mom. I *thought* by starting my own business, I would be contributing to our lifestyle. Boy was I wrong, this photography business was so time consuming, I didn't even have a chance to enjoy life...or my family...and they let me know about it. Many 'discussions' have been had about how much time I've been away or stared at the computer instead of participating in family rituals, such as the bedtime routine. My husband has always been 110% supportive of my business, although he hasn't always been pleased with how much time away I've spent from the family...between sessions & editing, it seemed we were never all together.
Well poo on that. I love what I do and I will continue to run my business as I see fit. So this summer I'm enjoying my family & I'm enjoying the weather, hot as it may be. I'm booking a very limited amount of portrait sessions. And I'm still updating my Etsy shop and doing all I can on the 'artsy' side of my business to promote sales. But I'm not marketing my portrait business until I'm blue in the face like I have in the past. I'm letting the other photogs in the area do that; they can miss out on their family time, I've learned my lesson.
I will continue to chase my dreams, but I will NOT do it at the cost of my family's happiness, or my own for that matter. There will be plenty of time when my monkeys are older and in school for me to market myself. For now, I'm Mommy & wife first, photographer second.